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4 year old needing help with things she used to do on her own

My almost 4 year old is reverting back to needing help with everything, things she was doing just a couple of months ago (getting dressed, wiping after the potty, buckling in the car seat). She refuses and wants me to do it for her. I’m sure it’s an attention/jealousy of the baby sister thing and I thought we were doing pretty well with that.
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Getting Daycare, Babysitters, and family on the same page…

I’m finding that my new found gentle style of parenting is not in line with how everyone around us cares for my kids. The baby is fine, she’s super cuddly and everyone is sweet on her, but my 3.5 year old, who is admittedly stubborn like her Mama, gets a bit more of a “firm tone” from Grandparents, etc. I also know they use
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